The Power of Letting Go: Overcoming Disappointment, and Moving Forward
Disappointment is a complex emotion that we have all experienced at some point in our lives (In Nigeria, we say “you’ve been served breakfast"). It is an emotion that can arise from various situations and can be triggered by different factors. For instance, it could be from missing an opportunity that we had high hopes for, such as a job promotion, admission to a school, or an award. It can also be from feeling let down by a friend who failed to meet our expectations, such as not showing up for an important event or not keeping a promise. Sometimes, it could be from the audacity of someone who has crossed our boundaries, such as an abusive partner, a bully, or someone who has betrayed our trust.
Disappointment can also stem from not achieving goals that we set for ourselves, such as losing weight, learning a new skill, or saving money. At times, it could be an intense kind of disappointment towards ourselves, consumed by guilt and a maelstrom of emotions. Sometimes, we may have been like a human sponge, eager to learn everything, but things didn't pan out as we had hoped, and we were left with feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.
These situations can be incredibly challenging to navigate, and they can have a profound impact on our mental and emotional well-being. However, it's important to remember that we are not alone in experiencing them. It's okay to feel disappointed, and it's normal to make mistakes. In fact, making mistakes is an essential part of the learning process, and it helps us grow and develop as individuals.
What's important is that we learn from our experiences and keep moving forward. We can use disappointment as an opportunity to reflect on our goals, values, and priorities. We can also use it as a motivation to work harder and smarter towards achieving our goals. By doing so, we can turn disappointment into a catalyst for growth and positive change in our lives.
I love this quote by Jim Carrey “If you aren't in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret."
It is important to protect your heart from bitterness. When we hold on to past hurt, it can weigh us down and prevent us from moving forward. It's important to acknowledge and process our pain, but it's equally important to let it go and not hold onto it for too long. Otherwise, it can build up like a tabernacle in our hearts, hindering our progress and growth.
Have you ever been so angry at someone that you forget why you were angry in the first place? That's what holding onto offense can do. It can burn our hearts and quench memories. Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting what happened or excusing someone's behavior. It means releasing the anger and resentment we feel towards that person and choosing to focus on the present and future instead of dwelling in the past.
It's important to develop a strong and resilient mindset that can withstand anything that comes our way. This means building a thick skin that can handle criticism and rejection without taking it personally. But at the same time, we must also have a soft and tender heart. We must be compassionate towards others, especially those who are hurting. People who are in pain often hurt others, and we must break this cycle by responding with kindness and understanding.
Our identity should be based on something greater than what we can see or feel. Today, let's take a look at overcoming offense from others.
Here’s a list of three non-negotiable steps you need to take to overcome disappointment and unleash your true personal power:
Step 1: Heal Hostilities.
HEAL! Don't let your pain isolate you from those who can help. Remember, stars shine brighter in constellations, and people often achieve more when they work together. So, reach out to those around you, even if it feels uncomfortable.
Don't miss out on the opportunity to find the support, guidance, and fresh perspective you need to overcome obstacles and make important decisions. You never know who might have the answers that could change everything.
Step 2: Bold Boundaries.
Creating healthy boundaries is crucial to achieving your goals and living a fulfilling life. It's important to safeguard your personal space by carefully choosing who you allow into your inner circle. Drama distracts from destiny and negativity can be major distractions that hinder your progress and slow you down. So, it's essential to identify those who bring joy, positivity, and encouragement into your life, and keep them close.
Acknowledge that not everyone can be a part of your core circle. You can't be friends with everyone, and that's okay. It's perfectly acceptable to love people from a distance and protect your heart from those who are not genuine or who do not align with your values.
Remember, setting boundaries is an act of self-love and self-care. Love yourself enough to surround yourself with a consistent group of people who uplift you and are true to their values. And always keep in mind that love is not the same as access. Choose your circle wisely, and watch yourself thrive.
Step 3: Ecstatic Expectation.
Instead of anticipating the worst, anticipate the best. Your mindset has a powerful influence on your life. By cultivating a positive outlook and expecting good things to happen, you'll attract more positive experiences and opportunities. So, don't let negative thoughts hold you back. Embrace optimistic thinking and watch your life transform.
Think about this...
Have you ever asked yourself these questions, "How do I want people to feel when they encounter me?," "How do I want to react to this situation?," "What could be my three most profitable pivotal actions if I don't over-emotionalize this situation?," "Who must I become to let go of this hurt?" These changed my orientation!
I've come to realize that the only person who can hold me back from being the best version of me is ME.
Therefore, I encourage you to wear your confidence, look like the solution you're bringing, and don't allow offense hold you back.
'No matter your position, circumstances, opportunities in life, you ALWAYS have the freedom of mind to choose how you experience, interpret and ultimately shape your world'- Brendon Burchard
Dwelling in the past will deter one's progress. When disapointment comes, the best thing to do is to forget and move forward with life. Although,in most cases, it is not easy.