Creating Healthy Boundaries for a More Fulfilling Life.
Have you ever found yourself saying YES when you really want to say no? I was always the “yes” girl, and when I started using my “no” muscles more, it felt super good. Boundaries are not easy, but it’s a muscle we grow overtime.
Saying "no" can help you set boundaries, prioritize your time, and maintain healthy relationships. It's natural to want to please everyone and be on good terms with others, but this can become problematic if you're constantly putting others' needs before your own.
Sometimes we give to others for the wrong reasons, such as wanting love, acceptance, or validation in return. However, true freedom comes when you no longer feel the need to impress people and can make decisions based on what's best for you. "NO" is a complete sentence, and it's okay to use it without feeling guilty or having to give explanations.
It is imperative that you take ownership of what matters most to you. This includes safeguarding your beliefs, ideas, emotions, time, aspirations, and physical well-being. No, this is not an excuse for normalized nonsense and bad behavior, and it is not a display of selfishness; it is basically an act of being a responsible steward of yourself.
Skills to Effectively Help You Develop Your Boundary Muscle:
Commitment: Learn to keep your commitments to yourself and take the time to honor your own needs. If for example, you've set aside some time for rest, don't be afraid to say no if someone asks for your help during that time. It's okay to be “busy doing nothing” sometimes.
Communication: It's important to establish your boundaries and make others aware of them. When someone crosses those boundaries, communicate with them and let them know how their actions or words have affected you. By doing so, you'll be able to reinforce your boundaries and ensure that others treat you with respect and consideration. Remember, communication is key to maintaining healthy relationships and preventing misunderstandings.
Breaking news: the world won't fall apart if you say no! It's okay to disappoint others, as it's impossible to please everyone. In fact, by trying to please everybody, you will end up not getting anything done.
You can’t be everyone's best friend. Not everyone will like you - be okay with them not having a reason why.
To avoid feeling depleted, resentful, and exhausted, it's important to replenish your own resources. You need to value your time and energy and use them wisely, as you can't pour from an empty cup - you can't give of yourself if you've not fed your soul yet.
Boundaries are essential and represent your standards for how you want to be treated by others. It's important to take yourself seriously and set boundaries accordingly.
It's important to close certain doors in your life not because of pride, but because they lead you nowhere. Pruning is necessary for growth, and having too much clutter around will only make you miserable.
Just because you can do something, it doesn't mean you should. The greatest distraction you'll face will be the noble things you can do but don't serve your purpose at the time.
Remember, while setting boundaries for yourself, don’t get overly involved in other people’s business.
Pruning is importanter 😊
I can totally relate to every sentence in this post. There’s a saying “you’re not jollof rice and you can’t please everyone”. Prioritizing myself is something in all for this year as I’ve always placed others above me.
Thank you for these very useful tips .